SubscribeMonthly Archives: August 2010
‘Real Housewives of New Jersey’: The Reunion
“This is sickening. I don’t want to watch anymore. I’m going to bed.”
So spake my wise and reality-TV weary fiance, midway through the “Real Housewives of New Jersey” reunion last night, summarizing what I and millions of other viewers likely felt at about 10:30/9:30 central last night.
And go to bed is exactly what I would have done, in order to hopefully bleed my eyes dry of the shitshow to which I bore witness courtesy of Bravo, were it not for my utter devotion to you, gentle Gloss readers, and conveying back to you all the horrific, gruesome, dirty, foul things that went on last night during that shameful hour of programming. I trust the rest of you turned it off in order to salvage your dignity, so here’s what happened. More »
You Need a Drink: Actually, Your Cow Does
What’s more delicious than a steak and wine? A steak from a cow who drinks wine. Cattle farmers in British Columbia are giving cows wine along with their regular food and claiming that it makes the steak produced from these cows tastier. More »
Quicklink: The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to appreciate these tuxedo-clad dancing dinosaurs.
Don’t You Step On My Alligator Shoes
Or my alligator shoes will eat your toes off, I swear to God. Don’t try them. Don’t. – If Shoes Could Kill… More »
Wouldn’t you love a pair of Nine West boots (with a pedometer!) signed by Nigel Barker? Become a fan of The Gloss on Facebook before 5 p.m. tomorrow and you’ll be entered to win this awesome Nine West Fashion Week prize pack. Not a Facebook fan yet? Just click here and hit the “Like” button.
Video: Advice For Girls From “Beauty and The Beast”‘s Belle
“If you find a man who’s big and hairy and beastly and kind of seems like he wants to hurt you, but he’s got a lot of money and big house stick it out! You can change him.” Belle, we told you this was a bad idea.
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Party Favors: It’s Not You, It’s You
Is the reason you’re single because – gasp! – you’re actually happier that way? – Lemondrop
It’s not enough that they have chocolate and watches: now the Swiss have invented the “sex box,” which gives prostitutes and their johns a little more privacy. – Time
Should you go to your sister’s waxing appointment with her? The correct answer, unless you are Kim Kardashian, is “hell to the no.” – The Frisky
MTV and Foursquare have partnered up. If you check into a health clinic to get tested for STDs, you’ll get a fancy new badge. Social networking has never looked so healthy. – Huffington Post
Here’s a guide to dating-related iPhone apps. Because if you’re not suave enough to write your own sexts, there’s an app for that. – CollegeCandy More »
Brag Shamelessly About Your Body: My Waist
This brag, from Alexandra Rae, is short. Scrumptious. Elegant. Much like popcorn chicken. And if you want to add your own shameless brag, e-mail me at Jennifer@thegloss.com
Dear waist,
I love you. You are so tiny. No matter how much weight I gain or lose you always stay the same. Granted I’ve never weighed more than 104 pounds, but I have faith in you. As my only curve you serve a valuable purpose; letting people know that I am,… More »
Do You See a Problem With This License Plate?
Suppose you love your boyfriend. Suppose you want to get him a really memorable gift. Suppose that gift is a custom license plate. Suppose his name is Andrew Ryan. Suppose the license you get for him is “A. Ryan 1.” Totally fine, right? Except not so much.
[Via Stuff.co.nz] More »
Video: Oprah’s Goodbye Video Has an Overemphasis On Skinny Oprah
In case you hadn’t heard, this is going to be the final season of Oprah Winfrey’s wildly successful talk show. This commercial, which ran during the Emmys Sunday night, features some classic Oprah moments through the years. I can’t help but notice, though, that it has a major emphasis on Skinny Oprah moments. More »
Anti-Aging Goggles Will Make You Pretty. Pretty Weird Looking.
Age cannot wither her, nor custom stale
Her infinite varietyother women cloy
The appetites they feed, but she makes hungry
Where most she satisfies; for vilest things
Become themselves in her, that the holy priests
Bless her when she is riggish.
Because she wears Japanese anti-aging goggles! They smoosh all her skin back to where it one was, so no one can see her wrinkles. And fortunately, now you can, too. For only $48. How much time tested make-up could you buy with that? Lots. (Cleo… More »
10 Things I Hope Happen on ‘Dancing With the Stars’ This Season
The cast of Dancing With the Stars‘ eleventh season was announced yesterday. Most of the contestants’ names had already been leaked, but that doesn’t mean the show is going to be any less awesome. Here are some of the hopes I have for the new season.
1. They make David Hasselhoff do a dance to “Cheeseburger in Paradise.”
2. The Situation and Bristol Palin hook up. Think of the potential future reality programming! Plus, we already know that Snooki voted for McCain. More »
Your Grandfather Looks Great In A Fedora
So do drunks and Indiana Jones! But really, mostly, if you’re a young man, you’ll still look like your Grandfather if you wear one. Or someone trying to rip off Mad Men. You know who you are. – FashionablyGeek More »
Gallery: Lessons Learned From Lifetime Television For Women
The only thing I find more educational than “Midnight Meat Train” on Chiller is “Mother, May I Sleep With Danger” on Lifetime. Mother’s answer really should have been “no”. God, the lessons we learn from Lifetime: Television for Women movies are inspiring, and stay with us forever. Here are a few that was try to incorporate into our daily lives as often as possible. More »
This Is What Lindsay Lohan Wore to Her Court Date
That’s right: a flannel shirt, jean shorts, giant sunglasses, and (you can’t see them in this photo) thigh-high stockings. Maybe Celebrity Court is different than Regular People Court, but Judge Judy would have totally thrown her out of the room if she showed up wearing this outfit.
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Retro Snap: RIP Corinne Day
British photographer Corinne Day passed away this weekend after a year long battle with a brain tumor. This picture is entitled “The Third Summer of Love, The Face, July 1990.” More »
Fashion 101: Pain Is Beauty
I love high heels. Not in the Carrie Bradshaw “walking 40 blocks in $400 shoes” Manolo fetishist kind of way, or anything. I just love them. I love that they are pretty. I love that they are womanly and glamorous. I love that they make me taller. I love the way my legs look in them. But most of all, I love that they make me feel powerful. I love my high heels, but they do not return my love. In fact, they turned on me.
A few weeks back, I noticed soreness in my foot; I ignored it. I began walking with a limp; I still ignored it. It got so bad that last week, after a lovely dinner with girlfriends, my friend Ana had to literally carry me home on her back when we couldn’t get a cab because it hurt too much to walk even a few steps. So I broke down and went to the doctor. And it turns out I have a stress fracture. More »
What Defines The World’s Worst Fashion Show?
We heard about the world’s worst fashion show on refinery 29, and we were intrigued. How bad can a fashion show be, really? Mostly you just sit around in chairs an watch people walk up and down while hoping that they fall over. (Some of us like to bet big on the “will a model fall down” pregame.) More »