Subscribe
Previous Post
Last week, Jamie shared that she doesn’t really like people coming up to her and touching her tattoos for no reason. Sane, yes? Yes. This prompted some male commenters to say things like “I see girls with tattoos and all i think is low class …” and “No problem, we all know what they mean any way: You’re easy, you uglied yourself up, and you easily follow shallow trends.”
I like the way they used “easy” twice in the same sentence.
In any event, this delighted me because it meant we could round up the man panel! And they would seem so enlightened and grammar savvy! And not as awful! Here is how some actual non-troll men feel about tattoos.
 | Four Things Better Than Your Bag Full Of Drug Store Make-Up |
 | Check Out These Tattooed Disney Princesses |
 | Some Of Your Concerns About My Tattoo Rant, Addressed |
 | Please Stop Asking Me What My Tattoos Mean |
Tattoos only fool shallow people who can’t see beyond the surface of things. That’s why I will never date a woman with a tattoo.
Have any of you tattooed ladies thought about what they are going to look like when you are fifty and your tats have faded and your skin is sagging. I have seen some and it is not pretty.
It always makes me giggle when people ask this, as though somehow that never crossed anyone’s minds. Oh! Thank goodness you’re here to rescue my future! Mercy on my soul!
You said it yourself: my skin will be sagging. Sagging is not exactly the epitome of cute as it is, so who cares? Most elderly people have age spots, which our society tells us should be eliminated; perhaps mine will just be covered up. I’ll be wrinkly, spotty, saggy, and probably a little bloated lookin’, so what exactly is so bad about having some skin be differently colored? Also: what business is that of yours?
How Men Feel: About Your Tattoos needs to be followed by Why You Should Give A Fuck: About What Men Think Of You. Because I just can’t figure out how! Gosh.
hell yea right on!!!
I’m not going to say I wouldn’t date a woman with a lot of tattoos, but she’d definitely be working against it whether by having a logical explanation for it or being otherwise great–kind of like a really pretty girl could be mildly awkward and get away with it, or a really funny girl could be a little too loud, or a girl that I really communicate well with could be too shy.
It’s not necessarily that the tattoos would take away from the visual appeal. They could go either way. Having a bunch of them that are difficult to conceal would make me think a girl isn’t big on foresight. If someone is going to put permanent marks on their body, think of the other things that have potentially permanent repercussions that they might have also done.
I personally find heavily tattooed women really pretty. I just think the designs tattooed on women should be well designed and well tattooed of course. If the designs on a lady flow with her natural shape and curves I find it enhances overall appearance. Sure I am a tattoo enthusiast but still judging a lady or anyone else’s personality because they are tattooed is just wrong. Some of the kindest and honorable people I know are heavily tattooed.
As they say never judge a book by it’s cover ;)
Um, really I don’t care how random men feel about my tattoos. I have 9, including one that spans my entire back. I love all my tattoos and couldn’t imagine myself without them. If a dude thinks I look ‘trashy’ or ‘dirty’ he’s obviously not a guy I’m trying to attract. There actually a pretty good deterrent to narrow minded douchebags.
Exactly what I was thinking. I have five and an appointment for a back piece week after next. It’s nice when people compliment my ink, but can’t say I really care if anyone else likes them or not. If a guy thinks I’m trashy, oh well, I would probably think he’s boring or a jerk, so it’s best we don’t get involved.
Thanks for the marvelous posting! I definitely enjoyed reading it, you happen to be a great author.I will be sure to bookmark your blog and will eventually come back later in life. I want to encourage you to definitely continue your great posts, have a nice morning!
I don’t really care if a girl has head-to-toe tats or none at all, but I do kind of get the feeling that people with tattoos see people without tattoos as too “vanilla”. Someone without tattoos could be seen as less expressive, less committed, less able to tolerate pain. If a guy has some huge fancy japanese tattoo vs none at all, I think the large majority of women would find the tattooed guy more masculine and attractive.
Now that tattoos are increasingly mainstream, the question to non-tattooed people these days is almost “what are you afraid of?”.
I disagree. Most of my friends don’t have tattoos. My boyfriend has far fewer tattoos than I and most of my exes were un-inked. If someone has tattoos, I’ll talk for hours about our experiences and what we want next, etc but as long as I can find something to talk to someone about, it doesn’t matter whether they’ve jumped on the body mod bandwagon or not. And depending on the tattoo, I’d actually look down on someone with something as stereotypical as a Japanese tattoo, because they often scream “flash” to me. At least someone without isn’t getting inked because it’s popular and may be more cautious (which I sometimes need to balance me out).
I have several tattoos and I promise, 99% of us tattoo owners don’t judge people who have none! If people are judgmental about those without tattoos, they should probably run back to Hot Topic with the rest of the non-conformists. I only judge people who have tattoos that look like they were poorly done because I assume they value the cheapness over the quality which is usually not a good thing when it comes to permanent shit on your body.
P.S. And I’m totally a brat about the pain; I always cry and need breaks that involve ice cream. So not able to tolerate pain!
Hey Andrew! I am a nice Jewish girl, and I have tattoos. And I dislike pain, and like to write thoughts down on paper. None of these things are mutually exclusive.
Fred: Thanks for the vote of confidence!
i think mike ness (social d.) said it best. “people used to get tattoos to be different, now people get tattoos to be the same”. its absolutely true that these days the majority of people who are getting tats are doing it to fit in. if putting a piece of metal through the bellybutton was trendy these are the same people that would be lining up to get that done too….oh wait thats true too haha! in other words whatever media is telling them looks he cool they will obey and follow. i live in hollywood california and i gotta say not having a tattoo is much more of a statement of individualism these days then getting one.
funny story for those who think that tattoos have a “deep” personal meaning- my ex decided to get a tattoo on her bday. she got the alcoholics anonymous serenity prayer tattooed on her wrist, after all she had not had a drink in almost two days at that point. anyway the sobriety lasted about a whole 2 more days and now shes just as drunk as ever and she grabs her drinks with the same hand shes got the tattoo on! kinda reminds me of the guy who bummed a cig off me at a show once who had “straightedge” tattoed on his back…admit it if you got a tramp stamp, “tribal” tats, or chinese writing you are the biggest posers in the world right now!
“its absolutely true that these days the majority of people who are getting tats are doing it to fit in.”
What qualifies you to make such a broad statement about a large portion of the population?
Your little story about your ex isn’t a funny story at all, and really isn’t about the tattoo on her wrist. Her struggle with alcohol is obviously personal to her, but her failure to stay sober doesn’t mean the tattoo doesn’t have meaning. It was AA that failed her, not her tattoo artist. Whether tattooed or not, committing to staying clean and sober is a major struggle for some people and making fun of their situations under the guise of a funny tattoo story is just juvenile and tasteless.
I have to laugh at Sam’s response: “Cutting your hair, wearing makeup, choosing what clothes to wear, shaving your legs/underarms/bikini line, etc. are all examples of ways people choose to alter their appearance.”
Yes, they are ways of altering ones appearance but there is a HUGE difference between those things and a tattoo. THEY ARE NOT PERMANENT.
If someone changes their mind about the hair cut they got, an outfit they wore, or make-up they tried they are free to do so. Tattoos on the other hand…
Yeah, tattoos will always out-do hippie long hair. But both are a form of human expression – which is always a good thing.
Oh I’m not arguing that tattoos aren’t a form of self expression, same as hippie hair, I’m just saying that using all of those as examples is a pretty poor argument.
In all honesty I’m ok with most tattoos. I think they should mean something to the person and not be there just “because”. I also think it’s smarter to have it in a place that is easily hidden in the event it needs to be, or the owner wants it to be.
To each their own. If you want to express yourself through tattoos, it’s your right to do so. Lots of people get tattoos for deeply personal reasons and others get them because they think they look cool. The reasons really don’t matter, but I think it’s important to be aware that essentially all people (at least in part) judge others on their appearance. If you’re ok with that reality, then ink up and live happily doing it. (And, maybe avoid blogs that make you angry about how other people don’t appreciate your way of expressing yourself)
I personally have no tattoos. I think my reasons are two-fold: 1. I feel I’m constantly changing and that what is important to me today may not be important tomorrow. If I’m going to carry something with me until I die, I want to be damn sure it’s something I will care about when I’m 80. 2. I find I express myself in different ways and I find that satisfying, so the desire for tattoos to do that job simply isn’t there.
On the flip side, I’d never date a guy who doesn’t have a tattoo.
If you still have clean and clear skin, you are either overly in love with your own physique (God made you PERFECT!) or you’re pasty white and scared of everything. Or, you’re not a deep thinker and can’t understand symbolism.
If you won’t date women that have tattoos, you have a very narrow idea of what femininity is and how it should look. In my world, femininity can include toughness, intelligence, passion, creativity, and a sense of humor… and tattoos that reflect that.
Hypocritical much?
seriously? only people with tattoos understand symbolisms? And do they use said symbolism to hide their unperfect bodies? tattoo means you’re tough, passionate and creative?
what the hell?
Wow, I’m one of the biggest supporters of tattoos, but this comment is just ridiculous. I read and write a lot about tattooing and this is the first time I have encountered a tattooed person who feels so strongly about non-tattooed people. Much of my writing puts emphasis on the idea that you cannot possibly know anything about a person based on the fact that they have tattoos. Each person is unique and has their own reasons for getting tattooed.
You are making the exact same judgments and are just as narrow minded as the people you are criticizing. Having an open mind works both ways. You can’t just proclaim that you would never date anyone with no tattoos and then go on to tell others that they have a narrow view of the world because they won’t date someone with tattoos. That is about as hypocritical as you can get.
I guess I need to think twice about using the old saying, “The only difference between tattooed people and non-tattooed people is tattooed people don’t care if you are not tattooed.”, because you just proved it wrong.
I’m heavily tattooed myself and I love tattoos on men and women. I just have to point something out about Dave’s comment about tattoos being skanky and not being able to bring a tattooed woman home to his parents. He says if he sees a tattoo while talking to a girl at the bar it’s a turnoff. You can’t bring a “skanky” tattooed girl home to mom and dad but you can bring a girl home you picked up at a bar? Who is skanky… the girl with a few tattoos or the girl who just went home with a stranger?
Woops, accidentally posted this as a response, so posting it again.
I kind of love Andrew’s response.
I can’t really fathom how any tattoo–of anything anywhere and of any size is ALWAYS skanky.
i have made the offer, to more than one girl, that i would pay to have an artist paint their next tat design on a canvas to hang on their wall, & have it made into buttons & put on a t-shirt if they agreed not to mutilate their body but they all refused. so it’s not about “art” or expressing some meaning. i have to agree with “you easily follow shallow trends.” i also think people (not just women) with tats have low-self esteem. my reasoning: if they were happy with the way they look they wouldn’t have to alter their appearance. (i’m not happy with my belly so i do sit ups). they also look dirty, like they missed a spot in the shower. they look absolutely horrible when coupled with formal wear. they are also very unprofessional. they are just awful.
I think one of the beautiful things about tattoos is that they’re extremely personal. You carry your tattoo with you always, not like some canvas on the wall. You carry it with you until your death, rather than the canvas, which can be sold or lost. A tattoo is customized to the contours of your body, which, if you ask me, is a way of celebrating and emphasizing them.
Do you think when Indian women decorate their bodies with henna designs for their weddings or celebrations that they look “dirty”? The designs are intricate, meaningful, and considered beautiful by many people, though I suppose you would consider it “awful,” especially since a wedding is a formal event, and body art looks “absolutely horrible when coupled with formal wear.”
If you think the only meaningful or beautiful art is the kind that can be hung on a wall, I think you’re pretty narrow.
Ha, I kind of love Andrew’s response.
I can’t really fathom how any tattoo–of anything anywhere and of any size is ALWAYS skanky.
They most likely refused because you sounded incredibly patronizing when attempting to dissuade them from making a personal (100% completely, wholly personal) decision about their bodies.
Additionally, learn a synonym for “also” and stop using zero capitalization. It looks unprofessional and absolutely horrible when coupled with formal wear.
1) Despite having tattoos and blue hair, I’ve never once had a parent disapprove of me. I would say “…that I’m aware of, at least,” but every single parent I’ve ever met asks me back several times and tells my significant other that I’m a good gal. Even a “nice girl,” despite what answer #1 states.
2) How are they “trends,” considering there’s an incredibly deep history of tattooing all over the world. And before somebody says, “but that’s THEIR culture, not YOURS,” how on earth would you know what my culture is by judging my appearance (or e-appearance)?
3) Cutting your hair, wearing makeup, choosing what clothes to wear, shaving your legs/underarms/bikini line, etc. are all examples of ways people choose to alter their appearance. Would somebody really shame them out of making those choices? They typically wouldn’t. Because those are “socially acceptable” alterations that men frequently enjoy women to do. But if it’s a tattoo, suddenly they’re all upset, screaming about “low self-esteem” and yadda yadda.
*Deep breath!*
That isn’t condescending or paternalistic at all. I can’t imagine why any of those women didn’t take you’re personal feelings about tattoos into account when making a decision for themselves and their bodies. How inconsiderate of them!
I don’t find tattoos look dirty and I’ve never had anyone ask if I missed a spot in the shower. I have had people offer to take my design and have it printed and I laugh at them. If I wanted it printed I would get it printed – I want it with me, on me, for life because that symbol/picture/design is something I hold closer than I hold the paintings on my wall. I am happy with how I look, I like how I look but I like to dress up my skin a little and show the world what I’m all about. When someone looks at me they may judge me but they still know a lot about me without my saying a word.
Mr_Man. While your offer might come from your best intentions, and I have a few pieces that I would love to ALSO have as art on the wall, i don’t think you understand what a tattoo means to some of us that have them. Whether they celebrate loss or victories, all of my tattoos have deep meaning to me, and their placements do as well. Whether it is because of the event, or a link to the chi flow and chakras, the placement of all, and the fact they are part of me, is as significant as the design itself. Many, many beautiful pieces are memorial pieces – literally wearing your heart on your sleeve – a reminder of those fallen and never forgotten.
You have the right not to do it yourself, not to look if it offends you. By judging and saying hurtful things, you say much more about yourself than you do about the individual you judge.
I’m still stumped as to why a tattoo creates a problem for introducing a woman to a SO’s parents…even if they somehow had an old-fashioned bias against tattoos, if the tattoo is discreet and can be covered by clothing, why would it matter?
*shrug*