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Here is a picture someone took of me that I like very much. I like the way I look pretty in it, and also the way that if you click on it enough times, I make money. (Don't worry, I show off my beer belly later in the photo set, making up for my facial cowardice.)
Look at this hag drinking coffee in the morning! OMG you guys, I look so fat and ugly. Correct me if I'm wrong! No, really! So ugly! I stayed up texting about life with Courtney Love and Michael Stipe soooo late last night, lol. BAD grown-up girl. I really need to go get my chakras aligned.
So I went on TV to talk about my fabulous new lifecasting venture and they put SO MUCH MAKEUP on me. HOW DARE THEY? They even emphasized my friggin' "eyes" and "cheekbones." I look WEIRD! (Please come over to my house every day, makeup lady.)
Goodness gracious, I am SUCH a lush. The only thing that got me out of bed and onto this plane to Saint-Tropez was two adderalls, eight xanaxes, and a fat rail of blow left over from the night before, lol. I didn't have time to do my hair or anything! Thank god there is wake-up vodka to keep me sane.
Check out my new manicure! It's nice, right??
This is really a subset of the last category, but there are so many of them out there that I felt it deserved an entry of its own.
It's 4am and I'm still awake. OH NOZ! Did I mention that I have an OMG-BOYFRIEND, who sometimes SLEEPS OVER in my bed with me and does sexy stuff?? His head is very tiny and he has no idea he's on the internet right now!
Here is a picture someone took of me that I like very much. I like the way I look pretty in it, and also the way that if you click on it enough times, I make money. (Don't worry, I show off my beer belly later in the photo set, making up for my facial cowardice.)
To be able to laugh at yourself is the sure sign of true humility. Good for you!
Maybe this is the wrong reaction, but I LIKE THAT CAT A LOT! I LOVE BROWN CATS!!
I like the way your manicure looks like no nail polish at all. Invisible manicures are the new trend!
They don’t have them in Manhattan yet.
It’s really sexy that you know how to laugh at yourself.
Ugh.
You’re so lovely and have far better tattoos than me… we’re in row, Ms. Peck.
I see how xojane can get annoying, but why all the bitching?
“I really need to go get my chakras aligned.”
You beautiful bitch. I could kiss you.
That sentence made me LOL pretty dern hard, too.
I’m so glad that this post exists. I think about this whenever I have to use a picture of myself. And I probably always wind up with one of these.