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In preparation for the final Harry Potter movie, I’m rewatching all of the films to date. Thanks, ABC Family, for that well-timed marathon last weekend and sorry, my DVR, for taking up so much space. In the middle of Prisoner of Azkaban last night (I’ll admit that I had this thought before last night) I had a revelation.
The books should be named after Hermione Granger.
Yes, yes, sad times about that whole your parents dying thing, Harry. Please see the condolences card I sent you 12 YEARS AGO for my sympathy. In the meantime, look at how many people are COMING OUT OF THE WOODWORK to be your new mentor. Even McGonagall is like, “Hey kid, here is a free fancy broom. Just because that one time when your parents died and you’re good at catching shit.”
On the other side of the common room, we have Hermione, who is Muggle born, which means she simply doesn’t have that same built-in support as Harry. She can’t go home to her parents and talk about how people keep trying to kill her because her parents just wouldn’t understand. And while she’s at school, instead of having every single teacher fall over their magic wand to get on her good side, she’s held down. People won’t stop talking about her Muggle parents and it’s all she can do to keep up her studies. By which I mean, BEING BETTER THAN ALL OF THE SCHOOL.
And when Snape assigns homework, Harry is all, “Wah-Wah, there is sport tomorrow, fulfilling my responsibility will be so hard.” MEANWHILE Hermione is MOVING FUCKING TIME so she can take more classes. Because girl knows SOMETHING is happening and she needs to STUDY THE EFF UP.
When the time comes around to fight, the boys are like, “oh wow, look at this thing that happened! Isn’t that crazy?” Meanwhile Hermione is like, “idiots, I figured that out like 5 books ago. CAN YOU PLEASE FOCUS.”
Who actually forms Dumbledore’s army? Hermione. Who has the perseverance and planning to help them survive for the 1908830 thousand pages when they were just sitting in a tent in the cold? Hermione. Supes glad you mastered the patronus charm, Harry, but without Hermione, you wouldn’t even have your wand.
And after she saves the day and just about everyone in the entire book/series/magical world tells her that she’s “the smartest witch for her age,” is it Hermione who finally gets the fancy broom? Of course not. SWOOP IN AN STEAL THE GLORY AGAIN, HORRIBLE HARRY.
In the final book, the girl has to wipe her parents’ memory of any trace of her so they’ll be protected. Essentially orphaning herself. But do people feel bad? Do they start going all Harry Potter on her? No. They are like, “Oh, hey, Hermione, all of my friends and family who still love me and still know who I am are getting together for a massive party. You can come if you want.” and she’s like, “Jolly, fucking jolly, assholes.”
And in the end? She gets stuck with Ron. Ron who did not age well, Ron who really hasn’t done much more than sulk since that one time when he moved the pieces correctly in Wizard’s chess. Ron. Even Snape is hotter than Ron. I mean, at least let her have a little something, something going on with Sirius before he dies. Sirius is deserving of a woman like Hermione.
Finally, I present you with this photo from last night’s premiere. Here are our favorite kids (God, Neville, stop being so goddamn hot), and who stands out? Hermione. Girl is like, “Fuck this bullshit. I own this series. I OWN THEM ALL.”
This post originally appeared on Joy’s blog, Your Daily Dose of Joy, which can be found here.
ok here the deal i think at first harry and Hermione Granger were so-post
to get together. but in the last two book j.r i heard when back and rewrite them for a happy ending for disney that why he got hook up with ron sister Ginny Weasley and hermione got ron that totally suck bye the way
so every one live happy ever after.
:(
Amen, sister.
I agree with the Ron stuff. All series long he bullies Hermione, and then they get married. Whaaa…?
I started reading fanfiction, and I found one perfect for you, Joy. Its on a site called fanfiction.net, the story being Harry Potter and the Champion’s Champion by DriftWood1965. Its a re-written version of the fourth book, and is apparently longer than said book. (Its also very, very funny.)
Now, go read it. Its awesome.
LOL! This is hilarious! I love them all to bits. And I think Harry Potter is just amazing the way it is.
Look, i love Hermione, really i do. She’s probably one of my all-time favorite literary characters!
But i completely disagree with this article. How many people here would actually read a book talking about Hermione’s boring muggle life and how she helps out her stupid friends do dangerous activities? Hermione is a really well developed character, but not in the way Harry is.
Yes, she’s smart and witty and pretty amazing all over. But come on, do you really want to read about that? It’d be like reading Twilight where the main character is just awesome in every way and everyone should love her. No, Hermione is there to support Harry and Ron. If you want her to be the main character in a story, go write your own fanfic.
Why thank you but I really for real love harry potter and yes I am the real Hermione Granger Emma Watson so fuck off i want harry potter
oh geez Snape’s name is not Sirius!
It is Severus.
Whoever wrote this.
Sirius is Harry’s God father.
AT LEAST check your work?
What the heck are you talking about? They didn’t claim that Snape is Sirius. Pretty sure the author was talking about different people. Check your work.
siiigh look its called harry potter the glasses the scar the wand if you dont like write your own book. Harry had to make sacrafices to apparently you didnt watch the movies harry didnt get off easy. All 3 of the characters had thir own special niche in story. Once again if you dont like it RIGHT UR OWN FRIGGIN BOOK gorsh
And if you don’t like the author’s opinion, write your own friggin article gorsh, but learn to spell first. And to use the comma.
i totally agree, i mean Harry always got off way too easy. Ron, Hermoine, and even the twins had to sacrifice things for him. I mean one lost an ear, while the other died. Let’s not forget all of the other people who died!
and Neville… he should of been the dude to kick voldemorts butt in the end, i mean he’s always been known as the joker character; clumsy, always the one getting hurt and losing stuff, and even always havin his wand broken!
Go read the books instead. It’ll paint a better picture of Harry being the true hero.
Wow. All your Ron Weasley-hate is really bringing me down, man. Believe me, I’ve been a ridiculously dedicated fan from the begining, and Hermione is one of my favourite characters. She breaks all the stereotypes for bookish girls out there, falls for the wonderfully adorable Ron, rather than expectedly falling for the hero. And she can really kick some Death Eater ass. But let’s not forget the fact that Ron is an incredibly loyal, loving friend. He can be moody sometimes, and he talks with food in his mouth, but that just makes him a more relatable, human character. Ron and Hermione are complete opposites, so their personalities balance each other. He makes her laugh, she makes sure he gets his work done. Harry needs both of them as friends. He had the crappiest childhood someone could ever imagine and still ended up being a moral person. That’s pretty amazing. Then, he continued to have a rough school life, and even after he lost a mother, father, godfather, and more, he continued providing for the ones he loved to protect them. HE WAS WILLING TO DIE SO VOLDEMORT WOULD BE DESTROYED. HE WALKED TO HIS OWN DEATH WILLINGLY. Just because Hermione’s a really awesome character doesn’t mean she should be the main character; that’s not what the story is about. Severus Snape isn’t the title character, but he was important all along. All of the characters were made with thought and interact beautifully with one another. Let’s also not forget the fact that she would have been squashed by a Mountain Troll if two certain eleven-year-olds hadn’t come to her rescue. Or,she would have been murdered by Bellatrix Lestrange if Ronald and Harry weren’t there.
Everyone talks about how Hermione saved Harry and Ron but she’s not the only life-saver.
Hermione wouldn’t be alive anymore without her friends either.
All three of them need each other!
In the first book, they wouldn’t have had a chance to get the stone without Ron and Harry would have drowned while trying to get the sword if Ron hadn’t helped him.
In Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban Harry saved Hermione and Sirius from the dementors, for example.
And Ron definitely deserves someone like Hermione, he stayed as Harry’s friend despite always standing in his shadow.
hermione granger <3 :)
While I agree with a lot of what you say I always hate the way people treat the loss of a parent during infancy. People will say things like “oh harry should just get over it he can’t remember them anyway.” or what you mentioned about “replacement” parents. I lost my father when I was two and nothing replaces that person in your life and it hurts just as much even if you never got a chance to know them. And it was not the same for Hermione. First, she got to grow up in loving safe environment with parents that supported her no matter what. Second, she still knew her parents were alive and waiting for her if she came out on the other side of the war. And third, Harry grew up in an environment where he was subjected to verbal and physical abuse, and used as a source of child labor. He was then repeatedly lied to and used throughout adolescence and then learned he had to kill himself to save everyone that he loves. Which he does like a boss. I’m a feminist and I would appreciate a series of popular books centered around a girl or woman other than the crap that is twilight Harry was not a bad character, and there were so many characters in Harry potter that one could look up to and emulate.
If you’re looking for a series of books centered around a girl or woman then look into The Hunger Games ,which i think could be the next Harry Potter, the movie is coming out next year,with Katniss Everdeen starting off barely getting by in a poor town to being the provider of her family at 16, to being a hero known by everyone or the Thirst series, its about vampires, but their 5,000 year old vampires or crazier than twilight by far newborns Thirst isn’t that popular but believe me, it should be.
Screw that. Ron is HOT.
This is why we have fanfic.
Someone worth mentioning is Narcissa Malfoy. Yes, her husband is evil, and her kid is a total prat, but her love and devotion to her child is admirable. She esseintially saved Harry’s life in the last book by claiming he was dead, after Harry told her that Malfoy was still alive. That’s being a mother, right there, loving your kid no matter what they do. I had a new respect for her by the end of the last book.she truly was a pawn, I almost feel bad for her. Some people will be like, “she was so totally EVIL!” but at the same time, I can’t imagine anything I wouldn’t say or do for my own sons. (maybe I am evil too)
So TRUE!!!! In Book 6 I begin to respect her a bit more, even if she isn’t concerned about saving Dumbledore’s life, she is concerned about her son. And by the end of Book 7 I was like holy shit Narcissa is amazing! Her husband is evil, but like you said she was a pawn.
Especially in the book when she runs into the castle through all the fighting to find her son. And that’s what the book is all about, at the end of the day it’s love that will save you. Everything is done for love.
So…you couldn’t get off last night, eh?
I love this. I shared it on Facebook. You are so right about Hermoine! Thanks for the laugh.
I posted about Harry Potter today: http://theresamilstein.blogspot.com
Unpopular opinion here maybe, but Snape is really a true hero as well. Without him, Harry Potter would never have survived the entire series. It was Snape who, despite his inherent dislike of Harry because he so resembled James, devoted himself to the boy’s protection, all because he loved Lily so much. I know some people might disagree, but Snape is possibly one of the most selfless characters in the entire series, and I wish we were able to learn more about his backstory.
I couldn’t agree more. I love Snape so much — he really is totally undervalued.
Totally agree!! The book goes into it in much more detail – how Snape came up with the idea of having the seven Harrys to throw off the death eaters because he had to appear loyal to Voldemort and so had to provide truthful intelligence for example.
Snape was awesome!
Although it was an epic love hate relationship with Snape throughout the entire series the last book finally revealed how I should have felt the entire time. He was a wonderful character and a true hero to Harry.
I thought the business about Snape providing the information about the seven Harry’s was one of the dumber parts of book 7. When the DeathEaters are tipped off about the time and date of the departure, it becomes incredibly likely that SOMEBODY will be killed, and a measureable chance that it will be Harry — and the Order can’t afford to lose any of these people.
And at the time Snape tells Voldemort about the date, he’s already KILLED DUMBLEDORE. If Voldemort doesn’t trust him after that, he’s never going to trust him no matter what he does. And Voldemort shouldn’t have any particular reason to expect him to know what’s going on in the Order anymore, anyway — obviously nobody in the Order would be talking to him after he KILLED DUMBLEDORE.
My thought was that Rawling just wanted to have a good excuse for a big midair battle at the opening of the book, and couldn’t figure out any other way for Voldemort to have the date.
Um, in defense of the other two heroes:
Ron- Ron won wizard’s chess in book 1. They wouldn’t have gotten to the logical fire part without him. Additionally, he sacrificed himself in order to give harry and hermione a chance. He got BEATEN by a chess piece! He was right there with everyone in the DA and fought in the Hall of Prophecies etc. He helped Harry shanghi Prof. Lockhart. He also attempts to defend Hermione’s honor several times (see: slug incident). It was Harry and Ron who went to find Hermione when the troll was out and they are the ones who knocked it out. Admittedly, they were part of the reason she was in there and they accidentally locked her in for a second. He turned out to be a better goalkeeper when he wasn’t being emo. He displayed talent, he just wasn’t as obvious as the others. In book 7, he destroys the locket horcrux which tortured him before he finished it. It was also Ron who saved Harry when the damn thing tried to kill him. He also figured out enough parseltongue to get back into the chamber and was the one who helped everyone escape from the burning room of requirement. Ron was plenty heroic.
Harry- Harry never asked for anything that happened to him and was famous simply for being the lone survivor of a tragedy. No one was clear on what exactly had happened and there were mixed emotions on the subject for many people. Now, mind you, I’m talking about the stuff he was initially famous for. So, Harry–unlike Hermione and somewhat like Ron–comes to hogwarts with the weight of expectations. Hermione’s parents knew nothing of the wizard world but were pleased and did not seem to pester Hermione about her studies. Ron, had the advantage of growing up with a wizarding family and knew how things worked at Hogwarts. Harry grew up in an abusive household, had fame thrust upon him, knew nothing of his world, and had to take these things with him to Hogwarts. Not to mention, Harry himself was connected to the man who tried to kill him because of that attempt. He gained parseltongue because of this…this didn’t help him in the Chamber of Secrets as far as endearing him to his classmates. Also, unlike both Hermione and Ron, he was marked by his past and, as a famous person, had all of his movements scrutinized. Let’s also not forget he had a teacher who hated him from the beginning. That’s a lot for an eleven year old who just found out he was a wizard and where he got his scar from. That surely isn’t an easy situation. His heart is also surprisingly untouched. he hates the dursley’s but wants to run away more than he wants to maim or murder them. He desires to sacrifice himself for his friends. In the final book, he accepts death willingly (which he has always done when the time came for it). He learns the Patronus charm perfectly at a young age (took him some time, but he made it corporeal when he got it down. brilliant). He buries a house-elf, treats a goblin like an equal, doesn’t care about someone being a squib or muggle born, and doesn’t want the most powerful wand in the world because he believes it is dangerous. Additionally, his treatment of his heirloom house-elf greatly improved when he found out how it suffered. He felt for him. Homeboy is a hero and deserves the book title.
Hermione is my favorite character, and indeed she does all the work. The seventh book is really “the Hermione Granger Show, also starring Harry Potter”. I mean, by the middle of book 7, she is still dragging the boys around because they haven’t learned to teleport by themselves. That’s like John Connor not knowing how to drive. They’re bored out of their minds camping on the run in book 7, and yet the boys don’t use the time to learn any useful spells or abilities.
I never understood what a high-flying go-getter like Hermione saw in a loser like Ron. He’s lazy, he’s less intelligent than his classmates, he’s content to slide by with the lowest passing grade, he’s rude, inconsiderate, and shiftless, and even among a low-status, low-class family, he’s the runt of the bunch. While his family challenged hardship and poverty, Ron was content to ride on the coat tails of his friends.