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Here’s a quick informal Real Talk for you: how old were you when you decided it was time to have sex? Funny thing, everyone seems to think they were a “late bloomer” regardless of when they actually lost their virginity.
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13 to a random 17 year old. Oops.
I was 18, he was 19. We’re still together and we are getting married this summer :)
At 25, to my boyfriend.
haha im just 13 and i was wondering when was the right time soo yea im a virgin XD :P
barely 15 and he was barely 16. two days after we started dating but we had no each other for awhile. it was in the front seat of his truck parked out in the middle of nowhere by an oil rig. at first i felt ashamed that i was so quick to give myself to him. but then i realized that it was meant to be like that and now i am 100% fine with it. If it was going to be anyone im glad it was him. We are still dating and will continue. I still love him with my whole heart.
I was definitely too young and he was definitely too old for me. It shouldn’t have happened. I wish I had waited.
21. On my wedding night. And I’ve never been with anyone else. And it’s still the most fantastic thing I ever did for myself (waiting for marriage). You have no idea the peace of mind that comes from having sex with only one person in your life, and how awesome the sex gets when you’ve been married for 10 years.
I was 19, almost 20; he was 20. We had dated for a year already (he was a virgin too) and very happy and committed to each other. First time wasn’t so great (it really hurt), but practice makes perfect.
5 years later, we got married, and we’re still very happy and committed. Yes, we’ve each only had 1 partner, but it doesn’t bother either of us.
19, with my then-boyfriend. It wasn’t good but then again I wasn’t expecting any fireworks. I really wanted to do it with the guy, so bam. We stayed together for 3 years after that. Don’t regret it at all.
21. I wasn’t waiting for anything in particular, I just didn’t want to have sex in high school. How much fun can you have if you’re hurrying to finish before your parents get home? Ridiculous. So I waited, then didn’t end up dating anyone for a while. Finally one night after a few beers during a cubs game, I decided to booty call this asshole I had been on and off with. He thought it was a pretty big deal and ended up singing me a song afterward. So despite my best efforts, it ended up being pretty ridiculous anyway.
i was 15 with my 16 year old boyfriend at the time. he wasn’t a virgin and he kind of pushed me into it. it was terrible though. even though he’d had experience he was awful. it hurt, then i felt nothing and it lasted for about 3 minutes. we broke up a month after. i didn’t have good sex or even an orgasm during sex until i was 18, with the guy who i’m still with now (i’m currently 20). i kind of regret it because, in hindsight, i wish i had saved it for my current boyfriend – i’m in love with him, when i was 15 i thought i ‘loved’ my then-boyfriend. but i guess we all make mistakes when we’re young.
Eat when you’re hungry. Have sex when you’re horny. All the stigma around virginity is depressing. If being a virgin will make him not want you then find someone who won’t care. OR Don’t say anything because, honestly does it really fucking matter? No. The sky and and the ground will still be there in morning if you lost your virginity the night before.
I’m almost 20, in college, and yeah guys definitely have that “omg can’t she’s gonna go all crazy over me” thing so I guess I’m kind of stuck? It would be nice if the guy actually cared about me and wasn’t a booty call thing.
Wow! I am in the exact same boat. I’ll be 20 in March and guys in college don’t want to date the virgin. They just want to “have” a virgin for a night. The only difference, no one knows I’m a virgin. Apparently I know too much. It sucks cause I don’t want to be a virgin forever, but I want it to be right.
Alanna & Candice: Don’t feel like you’re “behind the curve”. And don’t wrap up too much of your identity in the fact that you’re a virgin. If you do that, you’re setting yourself up for guilt no matter what. Will there be guys who hit the bricks when they realize they aren’t getting sex on the 3rd date? Most definitely yes. And that sucks and it hurts. But your first time should be something you think through. If you feel pressured or uneasy, it’s not the time. You’ll know when the time/person is right. Trust me. I was 25, and I felt great about it because it was MY decision.
I lost my virginity when I was twelve to a girl who was also twelve. Ironically we both turned out to be hoes lol.
I’m 20 and still a virgin and I feel sooooo conflicted about it because it is sort of expected at my liberal college that you have casual drunken sex. But my freshman year, my 2 best friends lost their virginities by being date raped. It really was hard for me (and of course for them) since I was reaised superconservative evangelical. I can’t decide wether I should just do it nike style or stick to my guns and wait for the right one..I can’t decide, any suggestions? but knowing that there are other over 20 virgins like me makes me feel a little better.
Just hold it. Trust me. At first when you lose it you may not care and act like it isn’t a big deal…but it will get you eventually. Trust me. I lost my virginity at 20 to no one special, just a one night thing…now I wish I was still a virgin because of the guy I am with being so much more worthy of something so special.
Stick to your guns. I’m 21, a college senior, and still a virgin. I can’t say that I know of too many virgins around my college either (they may be embarrased, though). People often say that it’s not a big deal; while it varies from person to person, I think that it matters more than people are willing to admit.
This article was awesome, btw.
Oh man I was barely 15, he was 18, and it was his first time too. We had been dating for like 6 months. Dated another 6 months The break up was terrible because he thought we were gonna get married, haha whoops. 7 years later and we haven’t spoken since my freshman year of college. I’m not sad about who it was or how it happened, just about how young I was. It did make me very sexually aware, pretty early.
I’m 27. I still haven’t. I couldn’t cope with the idea for literally the past 10 years, because of all the societal pressure to do it like it was a testament to your normalcy and social adjustment.
I’ve only just come to the point where I actually want sex for myself, as opposed to wanting it because I feel I have to prove something about myself.
hey its time to lose it…………………. its incredible trust me :-)
I was 18. My boyfriend had just turned 16, so it was legal. I have no regrets about it. The timing worked, it wasn’t awkward or terrible. We were both comfortable with each other and happy. The only thing that freaked me out was that we were in a park and I saw some deer watching. We broke up less than two months later because I went away to college and he couldn’t handle it, which I don’t blame him because he’s still a kid, but if I could have sex with him he could have tried harder to make it work for a little longer.
Well since you seem to want to only describe this from the female side of the equation, I’ll tell you about who broke me in. She was almost 17 and almost 2 years older than me, and I will always be grateful to her, because she was experienced and taught me, a young male, just starting out, how to make love to a young woman properly.
I guess 16. He was the first boy I was ever really crazy about. A year older, tall, played drums in a punk band. He lived across the street. Gave me my first non self induced orgasm…orally. On the first try too. so naturally i let him play ‘just the tip.’
Didn’t let a whole penis in there until freshman year of college though. that happened on the top bunk of his dorm room with his roommate asleep below. i got to be on top.