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Smeagolina wants you to use Plan B sparingly.
When someone mentioned there was an absolutely idiotic piece on XOJane about pharmacies being out of Plan B, I took notice, because I love Plan B. Plan B is a pill that, if taken within 72 hours of having unprotected sex, vastly decreases your risk of becoming pregnant. I believe in Plan B. “Get It Together” The post title prompted? Yes! I would get it together! I would personally picket to insure that pharmacies were fully stocked! If I could find time! Probably not! Honestly, I figured I’d just write a post backing them up, and talking about how terrific Plan B is.
Because every time a character on television has unprotected sex I adamantly encourage them – from my sofa – to go get Plan B. I’m very difficult to watch episodes of Sex and the City with, and was absolutely impossible to watch the sequel to That-Movie-Where-The-Pants-Travel with. And in this instance – having read only XO Jane’s headline about pharmacies being out of Plan B - I loudly declared to the person who mentioned the article that I had taken Plan B and it was a Godsend.
“Jen,” this person replied, “you took Plan B once. When you forgot a pill by a few hours. Which you’re allowed to do without any risk of pregnancy. The only thing that proves is that you’re insane.”
“But,” I replied, “What if Plan B had not been available?”
“Well,” they said, “you’d probably have lapsed into a wild state of neurosis, had a hysterical pregnancy, and, even once you were told that the pregnancy was not real, you’d have been so determined to go through with it, goddammit, that you would force your body to cobble together a baby out of kidney-stones and gallbladders and phlegm. And you’d currently be trying to get it into Spence.”
That is silly, of course. Little Smeagolina is enrolled at Hewitt, where she is understood and appreciated.
Still. If only for my peace of (sometimes irrationally worried) mind, I love that Plan B exists. I find great relief in knowing that I – that all women – have access to it, in the event that we do make mistakes and have the occasional lapse in judgement. And hey, who doesn’t have a lapse in judgement once and a while? We all mess up sometimes! Yay for back-up plans! (Have I mentioned that staring into Smeagolina’s sparkling kidney-stone eyes has given me new insight into what it means to be understanding? She’s mellowed me, is what she’s done.)
And then I read the actual article.
The problem is not that there is not enough Plan B. The problem is that the author is an idiot.
She is an idiot because she has sex and Plan B is the only protection she uses.
This must seem like a harsh judgement! Perhaps she has a vagina that is allergic to absolutely everything. Let’s look at the reason Cat Marnell has chosen to only use Plan B instead of any of the following methods such as (Cat’s statements are in italics)…
Yes but she’s a much better writer than you.
Thank you for this article! Few things upset me as much as people who can’t fuck responsibly, and I’m so glad someone else (or many elses) agrees with me. Using a condom, for example, is so basic, but for some reason so many people think having them makes you a slut (and they don’t mean it in the happy, fun way I mean it). Like this lady here: she “doesn’t sleep with that many people”? OH I GUESS ONLY HORRID SLUTS WHO SLEEP WITH EVERYONE CAN GET STDS AND BABIES, I FORGOT. I’m still angry about that article in Elle (I think) where Will I am (I think) basically said he’d break up with a woman if she had condoms because “that should be something we decide together wah wah women who take responsibility for their own health make me feel emasculated” and this seems like more of the same.
AND ALSO, what does she mean by “obviously I’ve had them [abortions]“? I’ve never had an abortion (though I definitely would!); it’s not like every woman on the planet has had at least one abortion. Though I suppose if you’re that stupid about birth control you do feel that abortions are an obvious consequence of an active sex life.
OR YOU COULD JUST USE BIRTH CONTROL YOU DUMB FUCK.
Amen Amanda!! I encourage all women… especially those who aren’t in a committed relationship, to use two forms of birth control. One form, of course, would be a condom…
I have often given them as stocking stuffers to my kids… now 19, 22 and 24 years old, two male, one female!! The ridiculous stupidity of the GIRL that wrote that article is appalling to me. And there ARE far too many conservative SOBs that would push their definition of morality on everyone!!
Someone needs to bitch slap that dumbass… until she starts to think, or quits her writing job!! She is a dangerous weapon for those that would take all our reproductive rights away.
Are guys responsible for any aspect of preventing an unwanted pregnancy? Maybe I’m out of line here and my comment is just plain dumb. But if I’m with a friend, and we weren’t initially intending to go home together, and then we do, and I don’t have any condoms on me, the first thing I’m going to ask her is if she has any protection. I’m also glad Patricia mentioned AIDS. I lived in Brazil for three months back in the late ’80s. Lots of casual sex – yes everybody used condoms, it was extremely risky, as is still now, not to. Cat is living on Mars.
I just want to say thanks for writing a well thought out response to Marnell’s idiocy. The article came out literally days after I had just taken Plan B, and not because I am a raving idiot who doesn’t use protection. My boyfriend and I, who are in a committed relationship, were using a condom because I’m not on the pill, and it broke at the crucial moment when condoms are supposed to not break. As a 21 year old still finishing my last year of college, I’m thankful that precautions like Plan B are out there, and as a personal who practices safe sex, I’m outraged that Cat Marnell is being considered a mouthpiece for our generation. I’d like to shove her old diaphragm down her throat to shut her up.
what the…..? Is this woman seriously advocating that condoms are for people who only have “a bucketload of people?”. I mean… Look my time machine works and it’s 1985. Oh no wait, by then people were starting to realize what could happen when you had unprotected sex.
Look. I don’t even know how to react to some of the things that were said. I find it appalling that this lady is paid to give women advice on their health. I mean sure, magazine advice should never be taken seriously, especially not when it comes to a) your heakth b) birth control. But come on, this is not only idiotic but it’s also very very – VERY – bad writing.
Seriously Cat, for the love of all that is holy, get another job. Then talk to a doctor and for fuck’s sake, get an adult psuedonym.
Cat’s article wasn’t great at all, you’re right. That said I’m kind of disappointed in The Gloss- “monkeys with typewriters”? Not to mention any sex-related post cannot be complete without a jab at XOJane/Cat. I think that’s quite an immature response, quite middle school-ish actually. That’s not how you respond to a “controversial” piece (hell, you might as well be giving XOJane even more fuel).
while i’m generally not super keen on calling my writing peers idiots: jennifer, you are right. she is a reckless idiot.
there’s this little thing that exists, even if you’re a blogger who likes to shock people. it’s called RESPONSIBILITY. and i don’t mean about whether or not you like letting dudes (be it one or be it multiple) do their thing in your unprotected lady bits. that’s America, right there- freedom to do stupid s**t.
what is irresponsible is, as you mention, 1) spreading false information when in a position of influence 2) speaking as an expert when only using anecdotal evidence and 3) (if she actually considers herself pro-choice, which i’m not convinced she is) giving those bastards in washington an excuse to take my reproductive rights away.
100% agree with this article. that girl needs a solid talking to.
I love XOJane, but can’t stand to read Cat’s articles because of exactly this type of nonsense. I really wish they let her go. She’s bringing the rest of them down.
Also, I don’t think the “monkeys with typewriters” comment is very nice or called for here. Most of the writers on the site seem to have it together and they work hard to make an, overall, excellent site. They seem to just have one really awful employee. Maybe they will wise up after the backlash from that horrible article.
While I do agree that she is clearly irresponsible in her personal choices and possibly in writing this article, I also can’t help but think, as regular reader of xojane.com and of Cat Marnell’s writing, it look a lot different in a larger context. Within that context, readers KNOW that Cat has long dealt with psychological problems, doesn’t take care of herself, and frequently makes questionable choices. But through all of this she is very real and honest and sort of becomes that frustrating yet lovable friend that you sort of have to accept is on her own path to self destruction, providing beauty tips on her way down. Knowing that, OF COURSE you shouldn’t base your personal choices about sex on anything she says, other than say, being aware that plan B is not being sold in New York right now, and this could be a serious issue for some women. The rest is just a side tangent, which unfortunately drew attention away from what is a very real issue for New York women right now.
An intelligent reponse to a very upsetting article, thank you Jennifer.
Just wanted to thank the Gloss for constantly expressing opinions that are multi-faceted, articulate, intelligent, and funny. Playing dumb isn’t cute anymore, and your constant infusion of high and low cultural references in your articles keep things relevant and fresh.
So again, thanks, for being a web site that takes itself seriously enough to One) admit it’s own shortcoming (ie posting exagerations for traffic occasionally) something that xojane can’t do.
Two) to take the time to add something relevant and thought out to the giant internet conversation.
and Three) To realize your words have power!
Thanks!
I have to apologize to Cat, because I’ve been going around thinking “who the fuck uses abortion to prevent babies instead of some kind of birth control?” Then I remembered that I have read about such a woman in the past. Of course, she was destitute, living in Soviet Russia, and would have given anything for birth control pills, but I guess she didn’t realize that they would make her fat.
A++++++++++
Wow. Seriously? She get’s a (somewhat) credible internet platform and she writes THAT?
Being British and incredibly thankful for legal access to free birth-control (I’m on the Implant, change it once every 3 years. Boom. Amazing), I try to follow the American side of the debate relatively closely – I’m frequently horrified at the knocks taken to women’s rights and the advocation of safe sex, the closing of family planning clinics and positively medieval reactions to unplanned pregnancies, not to mention the pundits and Michelle Bachmanns that litter the debate. But to write this, and actually put it forwards as a viable approach to birth-control and health, replete with giggles about how dumb she it, is bordering on criminally stupid.
If this leads to even ONE (well meaning but misguided) person turning away from safe, scientifically proven birth-control towards her methods then I think a public lynching is in order.
Personally, I can only hope people notice the the inconsistencies of her ridiculous solution, like the multiple abortions for gods sake, realise how absolutely brain dead she must be for not noticing how unsuccessful she is in preventing pregnancies and ignore her entirely.
I’m disgusted and I hope she NEVER breeds.
I’m deeply shocked that there are people walking around that are this dumb. On the intercourse level, she’s not only endangering her own health but also that of all her sex partners. On the discussion/media exposure level she may or may not have a negative influence as well. But what shocks me the most is the fact that she seems to have no self-respect whatsoever. Besides, I’m deeply appalled by knowing that she’s had to have several abortions, without her learning from the mistakes of her lack of carefulness. (I thought that, it apparently being a very traumatic and painful experience, would be enough to try to avoid it next time) It still baffles me how many girls and women refuse to take the pill because it “will make them fat or give them spots”, and how many of those also refer to condoms as “such a hassle”. It’s called being a grownup, be responsible! There are reasons why sex is for grownups.
In the comments, at some point, this Cat character said something along the lines of “abortion is like, usually bad…sometimes it can be bad, sometimes not as bad.” Then she proceeds to discuss her third abortion. I’m not one for judging people who’ve had abortions–I myself had a pretty horrible miscarriage that needed surgery–so I would never criticize somebody for having an abortion. What I do criticize, however, is the flippant nature of how she discusses birth control, responsibility, abortion–which, as somebody who took EVERY precaution to prevent pregnancy and still was forced to pay a shit ton of money to have a potentially life-saving operation because of an unplanned pregnancy, I sort of feel upset that somebody who’s had many of them would be so obnoxiously blase about them…but that’s just a personal opinion–and, overall, safe fucking sex.
Safe.
Fucking.
Sex.
Something we’re taught
She also has an article here: http://www.xojane.com/beauty/i-loathe-my-scary-dad-i-love-black-eyes-my-3-favorite-liners-all-time
that seemingly makes fun of domestic violence with it’s title. I mean, I get that there are all sorts of things to have a sense of humor about but, seriously, child abuse? HAHA MY DAD PUNCHES ME OMG LOL I’M SO RISKY. Regardless of it being tasteless it is, at the least, not funny and just…an idiotic joke.
I want to be convinced she’s either not a real person or that she suddenly will become intelligent and actually THINK about what she’s doing to women’s rights–because now, when people search “Plan B opinion” or something like that, she’ll fucking pop up–and not be such a dolt. But I think we all know that’s not true, and that people like this, unfortunately, exist and have computers to spread their idiocy. She’s not witty, she’s not cute, she’s not quirky, she’s not funny, and she’s, what, 19? 20? The whole “reality” aspect that she knows very little about the world will dawn on her eventually.
Aside from all that, she writes like a middle school C. Stodden whose only goal in life is to get a letter published in Cosmo and/or get recognized on the street for her “beauty.”
First of all- thank you for this article.
Secondly, is it just me, or is the explanation that at least something “created discussion” the worst cop out excuse ever? It seems to me that most of the conversation stemming from Cat’s article focused on either calling her out on her idiocy (or OX Jane’s for letting it run), or was trying to reassert the fact that women are perfectly capable of taking care of their own bodies, and of using all forms of birth control responsibly for that matter. Bitching about a writer’s ditziness or frantically reclaiming ground for women’s rights- sounds progressive.
You can’t just throw stupid out into the internet and call it stimulating because people got pissed.
“At least it created discussion” is the MOST INFURIATING COPOUT BULLSHIT EVER.
@superjack — Holy hostile; @ meg — You are probably aware of the worldwide web, yes? Conversations are happening beyond the highly intelletual banter on this site. Women are, in fact, perfectly capable of handling their own bodies. It’s fascinating that you all seem to think Cat’s post will single-handedly cause women to throw caution to the wind and get all freaky with their approach to birth control. You overestimate the power of one post and underestimate the intellect of the women you champion.
Sorry, intellectual. A typo.
Yeah, I don’t see Cat’s post having the power to influence women (or even teen girls) unless they are uneducated/have a reckless nature to begin with. And in those cases, “influence” wouldn’t be the right word? More just like they would read it & think “Yes, this is normal”
However, Jennifer (as well as some of the commenters) bring up a more important point: anyone with power & certain politcal leanings could use Cat as an example for their argument that women aren’t responsible enough to have reproductive rights. In that respect, the fact that the article was allowed to run on XOJane shows the site’s lack of awareness.
It also doesn’t speak well of them that their response to the controversy is to print a “joke” article about how no one can handle how “real” they are. If their schtick is to have a wesbite of diverse(?) women writing “real” (aka totally unedited and un-reviewed) articles, then fine– but there should be some kind self-awareness besides “I KNO THIS IS DUMB BUT LOL”
Cat should have read the Supreme Court decision for Gonzales v. Carhart.
“In describing the federal law’s justifications, Justice Kennedy said that banning the procedure was in fact good for women, protecting them against terminating their pregnancies by a method they might not fully understand in advance and would come to regret later.”
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/04/19/washington/19scotus.html?pagewanted=2
Basically, this language, that women might not be able to fully comprehend what exactly an abortion does is leading to the incredible numbers of laws being passed restricting abortion access based upon a “women’s right to know”.
Maybe she should have also read this from the Guttmacher Institute http://www.guttmacher.org/media/inthenews/2011/07/13/index.html
Then maybe she would actually value her reproductive freedom in NYC and come to know how precarious the situation is.
Way to set the whole women’s health movement back, Cat.
Also: EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW at her whole sex approach. EW EW EW EW EW.
Can we at least slap a giant FDA warning across this article? Please??
http://melanietheconstantreader.blogspot.com/
Cat’s post initiated further conversation on several fronts, which clearly is needed. All productive conversations, no; many thought-provoking, yes. Not certain your snarky swipes are the answer to the questions you raise — that’s my 40-year old insight for the twenty-somethings.